inspirational tools to create life balance in your everyday

2007 – finding everyday balance in september


Do you ever wonder why the clothes that tumble out of the dryer are never wrinkled? All that turning up, down and all around and the clothes come out new and fresh, warm to touch and wrinkle free. Sometimes our lives are like this. Having just experienced winter here in Sydney, I have watched those around me and experienced myself, the inner questioning that this hibernating time brings. The seasons in our lives that are the most challenging can seem unfair and meaningless while they are ocurring, but more often than not when spring appears, we are wrinkle free and in some tiny or large way changed for the better.

With September upon us we are greeted by a new season, a fresh start. In Australia, the bulbs of winter that we planted, begin to send up green shoots into warm air. Each new season gives us the opportunity for a shift in our lives. With a change in the weather, we have the opportunity to change our daily activities and as a result, our outlook on life can shift as well.

One of my favourite activities is walking. I love the steady rhythm of my own feet upon concrete or grass or rain soaked earth. The set is always changing on my walks, whether it is a difference in the weather or a new path. I watch the trees coming into bloom then dropping their leaves and I am reminded of the cycles of life. I am reminded that everything is changing, all of the time. The leaves that fall in autumn make way for the new blooms in spring. The people that we have known for years gradually change and move in different directions. Our own emotions and goals are constantly shifting in reference to new experiences and interests. In this, there is enormous freedom, we can lighten up on ourselves and those around us knowing that everything is in a constant state of change. If something difficult occurs in our lives, we can find solace in the fact that it will not last forever. When we experience joyful events and are aware of change, we can be truly present for them without taking them for granted.

In difficult times, when things aren’t working out the way “I think” they are meant to, I try to question whether or not things are simply in a state of change. Perhaps the goals that I have set no longer hold meaning because of events or experiences I have had since setting them. They may just need to be fine tuned. Have I moved away from my original goals? Are those in my life closest to me experiencing change? In the midst of that change, am I continuing to treat them in the same “old” way expecting their reactions to be predictable? By reacting in the way we always have we close the doors that invite change. The alternative to resisting change is to follow change.

This September, rather than forcing your way through experiences that feel awkward or difficult, I invite you to step through the doors that open with ease, even if they are unfamiliar or surprising. Although sometimes it may feel that you are moving away from your original goal, you may just be taking a different path to a similar outcome. One of the benefits that you may experience when you allow ease to enter your life, is greater energy and enthusiasm for the tasks and the people around you. When you try new things like walking to work instead of driving or allowing someone at work to help with a project instead of independently organising it yourself, you shift the energy flow in the same way that a fallen branch changes a flowing stream.

At first, this can feel uncomfortable. When your family member or friend offers to cook for your dinner party instead of making the same meal that you always cook, you may feel hesitant to say yes. When a new door opens you cannot predict the outcome, so in essence you are placing your faith in the unknown. This can be difficult, but the upside is that opening new doors can be exhilarating! New experiences allow you an opportunity for greater mindfulness and growth. The richness of all your senses will be enhanced in these moments and therefore you will have greater awareness of the tastes, sounds, smells, sights and feelings of the experience.

This September, with the commencement of a new season, experiment with choosing ease over struggle. Start small. Begin by observing the moments in your day that flow, the moments where you think to yourself “well that was easy”. Try this for a week and at the end of each day, take five minutes to write in your journal three things that eventuated that day with relative ease. These details can be small. For example, someone giving you their parking ticket with two hours still left on it after you had worried about the expense of parking in the city. A moment of ease which you hadn’t expected has appeared. When you notice these moments, your focus begins to shift from noticing the everyday hassles to noticing the moments of ease and flow. This awareness has the potential to cultivate greater ease in your daily life. After a week of noting down your three moments of ease, ask yourself if your week felt any different? Was there more laughter and less angst? It is amazing how this shift of focus can affect your overall well being and the relationships in your life.

In the second week of this process, look at ways that you can choose ease in your life. Begin to work flow into your daily life. Note two areas of your life where you tend to experience hassles, perhaps financial (not paying bills on time) or appointments (late or forgetting appointments). Carve out a moment with your journal and list three tiny changes that you could make in those areas. Be a detective for ease in your own life. Would changing your bills to be automatically deducted from your account save you stress and late fees? Would making a commitment to arriving five minutes early to appointments so you can spend a few minutes sitting in the quiet of a waiting room increase your well being? These moments where we have time to wait, at the bus stop or in line at the grocery store, can be treated as gifts when viewed as times of rest.

These tiny shifts are just a few examples of how you can commit to increasing ease in your life. I have included a further list of tips for ease under the “more balance in September” piece featured in this section. As always, I would love to hear about your experiences this month while experimenting with these tools. Feel free to write to me at the suggested email address below. Welcome to September, to spring or autumn depending on your hemisphere, and to the opportunities for everyday balance with ease! Enjoy.

This is a monthly inspiration piece brought to you by ‘everyday balance’. If you would like to subscribe to this newsletter, please send your name and email address to chrisadler@everydaybalance.net or visit this website in the first week of each month. For information regarding life coaching appointments in person, by telephone or online, send an email to the above address with your name and phone number.

posted under 2007 life balance